Self-Evaluation

For senior year at the Marine Academy of Science and Technology, I, Joseph DiMarco chose to be in Systems Engineering II. Since this entails creating a “Senior Capstone Design Project”, I originally decided to participate in the ROV MATE projected at the insistence of one of my classmates. However, this didn’t pan out, and I instead committed myself to an alternate project.
My actual project would be to design and test a video game for entry into a competition for the Technology Students Association (TSA). The project would entail me acquiring rudimentary knowledge in computer programming, designing characters and settings, and finally combining it all into a working system. The project of course would have to be school-appropriate and confined to the time allotted and my skill level.
So this is what led to the conception of my final design. I chose to limit my game to two-dimensions, and build it as a side-scroller, reminiscent of Super Mario Brothers. The idea was based around a concept called Willowbrook. This was a town set in an alternate dimension, where the main character, Hal, must try and escape. You would have to solve puzzles, gather items, and fight enemies in order to complete you objectives. In this way, I set out to design an RPG. I originally intended for the game to be designed in C++, a common, easily accessible computer language, and consist of seven levels, each consisting of numerous scenes, items, and characters to interact with.

However, this idea would undergo several revisions. While the general concept would remain the same, the chosen language was impractical to learn. My mentor barely scratched the surface after an entire semester of college. This inspired me to move my coding onto the Adobe© Flash™ platform. Since this method is more visual-based, it seemed less involved, and would be easier to wrap my head around. Of course this wasn’t to be, and I again was unable to utilize this system. Finally, as per the request of a fellow student, who was himself well-versed in video game design, I was introduced to the language, Python, and that is what the game is currently built off of.
By being moved to this system, however, the scope of my project would have to be narrowed significantly. Much of my artwork and level design would have to be cut out. Instead, the final project is a simpler, less engaging game, a victim of major time constraints, and limited foresight. That seems to be a common theme that runs throughout my project. I feel like if I had just dedicated even minimal effort to the process, played the game, so to speak, I would have had a much more fulfilling experience with this project.
I’m not really sure what my problem is. It’s not like I don’t want to assert myself, I just find myself afraid to apply the effort, and instead slack off. I guess I simply don’t want to suffer the humiliation of applying myself and failing. Another thing I learned is that if I am to give any effort, I need some kind of support structure to actually apply myself. If I had actually decided to stick with the ROV project, I probably would have done significantly better. Since this was a group affair, and a pet project of the instructors, I would have felt extra pressure to actually shift my inert mass into gear and peel out to a successful year. Also, I think that since my project was a fairly new undertaking for the staff, they were just as unsure as me as to what I should have been doing, so I mistook that as a sign that I could get away with anything. Still, I know that at the end of the day, all of these shortcomings are my “own damn fault”, and I will ultimately have to pay the price. If not now, later on down the road, in the real world where no one gives a what you do and will show no remorse in seeking retribution for failure. If I took away anything from this project, it’s the sobering wake-up call that if I don’t shape up soon, I’m going to be flipping burgers for the rest of my life.
So that, in essence is a summary of my senior year. My project, while completed, is nowhere near the level it could have been on, and I have some serious “self-evaluation” to do before I can become a productive member of society. I can only hope that somewhere in all of this lies the key to this answer I seek.